Alternative Reality World

I don't know what to write every times i say "alternative reality world" because it obviously didn't happens in real world.
alternative reality world just happens in those movies i watched. 
I always want to know what it looks like to life in alternative reality world. according to the movies, it was a cool worlds. but I will bet mine is not that cool.
I don't know why, i'm just sure of it... maybe it's because i know that my life isn't movies that has alternative reality world on it... heheheee i know, i watch too much movies :)

Despite that all, i still do want to see my life in that world, just to see if he in it.
Yeah... i know how pathetic that, still chasing and hoping for a guy that doesn't even remember me or worst, he doesn't even know me at all the beginning. 

Speaking of him, it get me to think that no matters where i am, i can't never be able to stop thinking about him. he's the main menu of my life, reality and alternative reality world.

So,alternative reality world are you even real? pleaselet me know so i can see what my life would be in your world :)

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it's been a while since i wrote on here, i still don't know why.
i've had a lot to say and to write but i can't find a perfect words to describe it and change it into some beautiful paragraph without ruins it.

i know ever since i have journal all i write about is about him, yeah the one and only.
it seems not fair, after all this time i still write about him and he just keeps forgetting me.
it almost seems like he never know or met me, well, the never know part is true, cause he never know about me, but still the time i've had with him was the best time of my life

i don't know what to do with this feeling that i've been carry for the last 8 years, i don't want to move on nor forgetting him, but the feeling, i starting feels like it fade away.

so tell me, if you read this, tell me, what should i do with this feeling?
it's my feeling for you that i keeps alive, so tell me, because i don't know what should i do?
you, yeah you, the guy from 3b SLTP 14, 8 years ago...
help me!!